Personal Development Books
I always held a skeptical view of self-help books. Ironically, I had formed an opinion about them without even reading a single one. Despite considering myself an open-minded person, I realized I had some reservations when it came to self-help literature.
In moments of feeling stuck and uncertain about my next steps in life, I naturally gravitated towards novels. Over the course of a year, I read countless books, instinctively drawn to narratives that explored the quest for happiness and the meaning of life. These books offered diverse perspectives, ranging from Eastern philosophies and Western scientific views to the ancient wisdom of South American shamanism and thought-provoking works of fiction. Engaging with these diverse works greatly contributed to opening my mind. However, among all the books I read, three stood out as transformative catalysts on my personal development journey.
BOOK 1: Kilometre Zero, Maud Ankaoua
When everything started
The first novel I read that opened my mind. The author explains very simply how you can choose to live your life based on either fear or love. It's easy to say but not easy to do. Today, after two years of reading that book, I try to always keep that in mind - all my actions and words should be love-based. It took me a while to get there, and fear is always lurking, ready to make a comeback.
The other two learnings that have stayed with me from the book after two years are:
my life is filled with three main rocks, and the rest is sand filling the gaps. The rocks are pillars in my life that must be prioritized to be happy. I realized that I hadn't placed those main rocks as priorities before.
I had to fall thousands of times before learning how to walk. It's a pity that as adults, we try once, twice, maybe three times, and if we fail, we give up. Often, it takes more than three attempts to learn something new or form a habit. I just need to be patient and kind with myself, and I will get there.
BOOK 2: 4 and 5th agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
First applications of basic principles in my daily life
The Four agreements and The 5th Agreement are the first self-help books I read (I did not know at the time they were self-help books). I liked The 5th Agreement book even more, as the author offers a perspective that resonated with me. It made me realize that everyone is the star of their own movie, and the way I perceive a certain moment or situation may be very different from how another person present perceives it.
The first time I read The Four Agreements, I mainly understood three out of the four agreements. I started applying two of them in my daily routine “Don’t take anything personally” and “Don’t make assumptions” . (Read Train the Mind for Positive Thoughts post to know how it helped me).
It took me a while to grasp the first one “Be impeccable with your word” and find practical applications for it. The way I interpret it is to stop judging or being critical. Once I stopped criticizing people, my inner critic began to diminish. I strive to use more loving language in general. Now, I understand I need to speak my own truth while paying attention to the impact of my words.
These 5 agreements have become an integral part of my life's playbook. I make a conscious effort to revisit them regularly and apply them in my day-to-day experiences.
Be impeccable with your word
Don’t take anything personally
Don’t make assumptions
Always do your best
Be skeptical but learn how to listen.
BOOK 3: The Code of the Extraordinary Mind by Vishen Lakhiani
The realization I am the creator of my own life
My coach recommended this book to me when I expressed a desire for a break. Reading it opened up a world of countless other books I wanted to explore. It also made me realize that personal growth can take countless paths. Here are the key insights I gained:
Discovering who I truly want to become and the steps to get there
Assessing areas of my life for improvement
Embracing visualization as a practice
Incorporating the 6-phase meditation into my daily routine
One aspect I particularly enjoyed was the additional digital content featuring inspiring speakers. I had a genuine "aha" moment while listening to Ken Wilber's interview on the ideal education system. Click here for the podcast.
Self-help books not only opened my mind, they changed my life. New thoughts are good. But actions are the ones that create change.
When selecting a personal development book, I follow my instincts and choose topics that resonate with me or areas I genuinely desire to improve and grow in.
I'm curious, if you were to start with a personal development book, which one would you choose?
