Meet The Voice of Love

I used to be guided by my rational mind, relying on its strong analytical thinking to tackle problems and find answers to all my questions. I would explore various potential outcomes, carefully weighing the pros and cons before making a decision. In a sense, I possessed a highly deliberative mind. Therefore, whenever I faced a decision, I instinctively tapped into this rational thinking, opting for the best and safest course of action.

But when it came to answering questions like what I wanted to do next in my life, what would make me happy, or what my purpose was, my rational thinking had revealed its limits: a big blank. I could not solve my own equation.

So what did I do to find the answers?

1/ Travel inwards, instead of outwards:

I needed time and space, so I made the decision to take a three-month break from work to figure things out. Like many people, I considered traveling, but I quickly dismissed that option. I recognized it as a temporary diversion that wouldn't address the genuine, underlying, and unconscious source of my unhappiness.

Here I am, defying the mainstream trend and embracing a gut feeling, surrendering to an overwhelming instinct. I embarked on a different kind of journey—an introspective one. I began delving into my inner world, seeking to unearth the root cause and discover what was amiss for me to achieve genuine happiness.

2/ Reconnect with self-love

My primary intention was to enhance my personal life, a facet that I had long neglected. Therefore, I posed a crucial question to myself: What is the utmost priority for me to address at this moment? The answer resounded: my love life. Instead of aimlessly seeking the perfect partner and depleting my energy in countless external pursuits, I turned inward. I got a self-help book centered on love, seeking to unveil the missing piece—self-love. (See post: All I Need is Love).

3/ Open the heart

Over two months, I dedicated myself to reconnecting with my emotions, and releasing the emotional burdens I had carried regarding love. This transformative process rekindled the flame that had been dimmed within me, fostering a profound reconnection with self-love. With newfound warmth in my heart, I began extending acts of love towards others, and embodying love in my interactions. I strove to enrich my relationships, particularly those that had presented challenges. This endeavor involved actively listening with all my heart (see post: Conversation with Dad) and challenging myself to perform acts of kindness I had never done before.

This was when the first magical moment happened, an unforgettable experience that etched itself into my memory. Many times before, I had heard about the energetic meridians that traverse our bodies, but this time, I not only heard, I felt. I felt a gradual opening sensation near my heart, on the left side, as if an artery was unblocking, allowing my breath to flow more smoothly.

My heart just opened!

4/ Meet the Voice of Love

Sensing that I had reached a pivotal chapter in my journey towards love, I began posing a new question to myself prior to each meditation session: What is the next step for me? And unexpectedly, during meditation, I heard an inner voice, whispering one word only: 'Create'. It was a new voice, very short, very rapid, and very illogical, whispering a single word and then gone, leaving no opportunity for rewind or replay.

Because I had held another limiting belief about myself—I am not creative—this suggestion stood in stark contrast to what I would typically tell myself. Because it was so the opposite of what I would say, I found myself in clear disagreement with it, and my ego voice took over, cynically stating, 'Create, create... Easy for you to say, whoever you are...'

Because this thought seemed illogical, diverging from any previous reasoning I had known, I came to the realization that it was not the voice of my usual rational thinking, or the voice of fear, or my ego.

Because of this, I understood that I had just met the voice of love.

The beauty of personal development journey is that I started to encounter the irrational. It made me wonder: What if logic is not all that is?

What about you? What have you tried to open your heart and reconnect with the voice of love?